Oh the Art student/Dreams/Ambitions

So i may not be an art major but i am minoring in graphic design and i have found that i have mostly art classes to finish school by the closing of this year or at most by next summer. Well last week was complete hell and my stress levels went through the roof but i find myself developing as an artist. Turns out what i really want to do in life is be an artist, a graphic designer, an illustrator.

I want to design, write, and illustrate children's books. Maybe one day i will be good enough to be a published and well know author and illustrator and get my name out there and have the "fame" i always dreamed of... back when being an actress was my goal.

And still...

The dreams never end...

I truly long to have a simple and beautiful house, the kind you almost never want to leave, with a dog or two, maybe a Corgi, American bulldog, or a Lab... i don't know? I do know that i want those laughing happy eyes to bound up the yard or to the door to great me home everyday. I want to smell the pasture land nearby and see my horses ears prick up and whinny in my direction, possibly. eventually i want children as well, laughing and playing in the backyard... i haven't dreamt this out very well because it's something i am also afraid to dwell on for to long, for now i am happy with my nephew, niece and whatever is on it's way! Yes i know i want family but how soon do i want it remains unanswered in even my own mind.

I never considered myself the ambitious type or determined, and i feel others have felt the same way, but the way i see it, now, is that i am all those things just going in different directions then others. Some will continue on with me in my life and others won't and haven't but that's up to them, but ultimately up to me. In the end I say who stays and who goes for the most part because of course i can't effect the course of free will.

Anyway enough babbling i feel like a go on and on... its lunch time, time to get out and continue my day and my life!